Feet in a tank full of fish. Fish ready to eat dead skin. I'm sorry, I know it is gross. Photo by me.

For $3 in Siem Reap, fish will eat the dead skin off your feet.

Fish pedicures are a common sight in a popular tourist area in Siem Reap called Pub Street. You can also find them in other areas: There was a fish pedicure kiosk in a mall in Nha Trang, Vietnam. I think there are some salons in Northern Virginia that offer the service.

Today, I had $3 in my wallet. Fish pedicures are $3. Little fishes peck at my toes in Santa Rosa Beach, which I find cute. And a month of flip-flops put my feet into gross shape. A fish pedicure should be no big deal…

Except these fish in the tank were 10 times bigger than the ones in Santa Rosa. And they’re black and orange, while the little cutie fishies in Santa Rosa are silver and small. When I dunked my feet in, the fish basically suction-cup-sucked their mouths to my feet millions of times.

One creeper orange fish just permanently stuck his mouth on the underside of my right foot. If he were human, he’d definitely be the guy who lines his pockets with Ziploc bags at the Sizzler buffet.

I forced my eyes to shut as much as possible; otherwise, my reflexes would kick the fish away.

The attendant told passersby that my feet in the tank started “fish happy hour.” It was 9 a.m.

Kiwi went to go browse in the bookstore while the feet-pirhanas went at it. I could have stayed as long as I would have liked. I lasted maybe 10 minutes.

Gross feet, sizeable fish, weird sensation, shame of starting off fish happy hour before noon. I gave it the old college try, and will not give it another college try. But my feet are softer…